Finding Your Purpose 101

Hello Prospective Student:

My name is Gessie Belizaire; I am your future host and instructor. Rather than lecture you and tell you how or why I am qualified to tell you what to do about how to find your purpose, I want to instead share with you my testimony and to tell you why and how I genuinely came to find my purpose.

Some people spend their whole lives not knowing what their purpose is in life. I was fortunate to have been told by many strangers, that I came out running. I guess that was their way of saying that I have been on my quest to finding my purpose since birth. "Who have I been since birth, do you ask?" I am a Haitian native that was raised in a, strict two parent household in Rhode Island, to a family of six. I have three siblings: two sisters and one brother. When I was growing up I spent the majority of my time with my siblings in three places: home, school, and church. In my native tongue, all three places were referred to as the three L’s. It was at those places that I developed myself along with my core values. I learned from these places; how to have a good work ethic, how to be determined, how to assert my voice, and how to stand on my own two feet. I went on to excel in college, to start my own philanthropy based student organization, and to graduate among the top in my class. I thought from that moment that I was on my way towards success and towards finding my purpose. I made the decision after college that I was going to move to DC to attend graduate school at Howard University. I made it to DC with just an acceptance letter and a dream that I was going to continue my quest to find myself and to help others to do the same.

Oh, did I find myself alright! I found myself one year into my two years Masters program living alone in a city where I knew very few, pregnant, unwed, and just a scared mess.

Life has a funny way of happening to you when you find yourself going the course, that it just knocks you off of your purpose. Being pregnant and unwed for me knocked me off of my course. "I should have known better," was what I kept saying to myself over and over again. For a while I hated myself for allowing my narrative to be among the statistic of black women who were pregnant and unwed. I went from secretly hating myself to putting all of my energy into being a first time mom. Everything became so much about her that I forgot to also check in with myself like I used to. Because of it, I spent a period after having my daughter being in deep depression. I did not want to do the things that once brought me joy, be around others, or even leave the house. The sense of who I am was lost. I could not feel my core. I was left with a gap, an abyss, and an empty space inside. Although I was empty inside I was still someone’s mom and I did my best to wear that title as a badge of honor.

My self-worth at the time was tied to me being a mom and it became suddenly important how others viewed me as a mother. I was seeking reassurance and praise from others just to feel okay about myself…and I knew something had to give because I was not used to putting my emotional well-being in the hands of others. It took me three years of wearing the mask before I could get back to running the course that is my purpose in life. I began my run back to self by first becoming aware that I had lost my identity.

I spent the next two and a half years with the intention that I was the most important relationship/project that I would ever work on. Through exploration, I fell in love with the things that mattered to me once more, like writing. I took a leap out on faith and sought to publish my writings in newsletters and online magazines. It was then that I landed the writing gig for EmPower Magazine’s Do Gooder Section, an online publication dedicated to covering positive stories about African Americans. It was there that I met people from all different walks of life who all shared a tenacity to be veracious. I was inspired by those I met to live my life in truth. I continued to explore the ever evolving question of ‘Who am I?’ and from there came amazing things. In addition to writing for EmPower Magazine, I would go on to start my own blog titled This Life I Live in Truth and I would go on to join an online community of tutors and teach children and young adults with special needs about study skills and how to maximize their independence. I began to do the things and to build the lasting relationships that I deemed mattered. I became a better me because of all these things and an even better mom, partner, co-worker, sister, daughter, cousin, and friend. After I had taken into account where I had been, I realized just how far I have come. I want to share this journey with you through this e-course. If you, like me, have ever faced a challenge that just took you away from your purpose, then this course is for you. In this course, we will explore the 7 truths about finding our purpose and work through journaling, reading, teaching and reflection to find our way to our purpose and our life mission essentially.